If there is a shooting or ...

[Redbeard]

...a stabbing in my town today, I might be the cause of it. I just had the most awesome wrong number ever call my cell phone. I'll just type out the dialog as best I can. I think you'll get the gist. It was a local number from my little home town, which I know cause of the area code and first three of the phone number.

Me: "hello?"

Him: "hey quit stealing my newspapers" (in what sounds like a Pilipino accent)

Me: (thinking who the hell is this? Is it one of my friends playin a prank?) "What are you talking about?"

Him: "it your neighbor and your stealing my f@&$ing newspapers from the front of my house in the mornings. I know it's you. I saw you do it!"

Me: (ok this is real and unbelievable and I've gotta play along). "I'm not stealing your stupid newspapers. Leave me alone"

Him: "I saw you take my f&@ing newspapers and I'm coming over to your house right now!" (I can tell he's walking and talking)

Me: (oh crap this escalated quickly) "screw you man I didn't take your f$&@ing paper. Go ahead come over"

Him: I am. I'm walking up right now a&$hole and we're gonna straighten this shit out."

Me: "go ahead and try"

Him: "I'm f$&@ing here, answer the door."

Click

In a sick and perverted way, i enjoyed it. That was too good to pass up. That'll never happen to me again in my lifetime

[capt1972]

[benelliquackstacker]

Thats farking hilarious Red. I wish I could have seen the guys face as he opens his door and sees a pissed off little asian man about to open a can of whoopa$$ on him.

[3legged_lab]

Nice job red, sometimes you just gotta roll with it cause its too good to pass up

[Olly]

You really are a public servant. You just tought a random stranger the wise knowledge not to steal an Asians newspaper.

Sent from Tapatalk

[Tiler_J]

I think you should call him back, you have his number. Tell him that his paper is now yours and that you are claiming his front yard as part of your property and that you don't want to see him walking on "Your" lawn any more!

[Redbeard]

I think you should call him back, you have his number. Tell him that his paper is now yours and that you are claiming his front yard as part of your property and that you don't want to see him walking on "Your" lawn any more!

calling him back has crossed my mind

[Bootlipkiller]

Red I don't know if you get the Jamaicans pulling the phone fraud scams on the little old lady up in your area but we get it around here all the time. If the victim has a number I always call it back just to see if some jamaican answers the phone. One day the call went through and some jamacin guy answered "hello", I said yea my name is bill I got a message that I won $100,000.00 and I need to send you $3000.00 to get my money, "how do I do it"? He went on telling me and at the end of the conversation I paused and said, "I'm an agent with the US government, hope you enjoyed scamming old lady's because your going to prison, there coming up to your door now you better run!

I could her what sounded like they guy running around his mud hut in Jamaica and then he hung up. I laughed all day over that one.

[Redbeard]

That's funny